And I quote...

"She should just cut his dick off right there in front of the subway station entrance."
Clearly, my daughter has some anger towards men at the moment. This is her response to a movie we are watching where the husband is complaining about not gettin any for two months after the baby was born.

Some days...

Some days it just feels like all of the sudden you get slapped upside the head, then suddenly you get slapped upside the other. Then you cry all the way home from work, in the car hoping all those commuters can't see how red your face is or how you are yelling at no one in the car with tears running down your face.

Happy Thanksgiving; My soon to be ex-son-in-law is a scum of the earth dead beat dad who is slowly chipping away at my daughters sanity and my best friends mother just found out she has breast cancer. Yes, none of this is happening to me personally but really, it is.

Just last week I was wondering why I was worrying and obsessing over stuff I usually don't. I thought it was PMS. I was feeling better about life the last few days because I was just this side of my "monthly gift" and damn happy about it. Yeah, right.

I need some serious me time, some meditation, some therapy. At the moment Vodka will do.

Camo

Had to go all small font and less color so I can read and write and not have people from across the room read my junk. I'm actually having to type this in an e-mail and then post. Maybe if I type it in Word I can check my grammar too.

I'm liking the cleanliness of the blog. My life is just so crammed full of stuff; people, items, people, things to do, people needing me....I crave simple, sparse spaces.

I've noticed when I view Dooce's daily photos that I always feel better, peaceful, more focused. Man she probably has no idea how powerful she is. Still trying to figure out how to capture the light the way she does.

Okay, more later regarding one little person who is filling my life up with giggles and smiles and cuddles so much that I have even less time to get things done. Oh and then Hubby announces, yesterday, he wants to buy a bigger house. Whoa! AS IF...we don't have enough going on already.

Thanksgiving

Oh I know, I should do a list of what I'm thankful for here instead of my usual whining about how tired I am or how crowded and messy my house is or how my kids (when all three are together) are in some kind of competition for what I don't know or how my husband is helping everyone else and not fixing our drafty ass house or how busy yet boring my work is or how I have absolutely no time to shoot, read, write, think, exercise.....Man does that keep me in a funk or what.

And now, we are getting ready to go to my brother-in-laws for an early Thanksgiving dinner. EVERYONE will be there. Normally this would be cause for a few shots (translate: bring full flask) but I'm not going to go there today. I need to behave. I always regret the venom that comes out of my mouth when I do that at family functions.

And then I have people, too many people in my house, especially at the moment, can't write because they are looking over my shoulder and I can't write at work because, it's work, damn it. Maybe I do need to just spend some money on a lap top of my own after I buy a new washer and dryer.

Really, I'm thankful for all that I have. Sometimes though it is really just too much.

Not that I have been posting much anyway...

I barely have time to read my favorite blogs let alone post. Work has been crazy busy, as usual. And now tomorrow, I'm flying out to New York so my daughter, grandson and I can drive back to California where they belong. I have always wanted to drive across the country but I really wanted to take my time. I'm hoping this trip isn't like the Canon Ball Run.

Should we stop to see my opinionated, card carrying "scared of Obama" Republican mother? Still thinking about that one. I mean, it is 300 miles out of our way and we will be traveling with a seven month old. A very vocal seven month old. Old people can't deal with that. Hell, I'm not even sure I can deal with that.

So, yeah, won't be even touching a computer for several days. How in the hell will I survive?! Oh yeah, by enjoying the scenery, the US of A, my grandson, bonding time with my daughter and trying to capture as much of it as I can with my camera.

Must go pack so I can go to bed.

In the middle of the night

When my cat had woken me up once again to go outside, my brain kicked into high gear, as usual. One of the things I thought about, in addition to how the hell I'm going to get my daughter and grandson home from New York and how I really need to exercise, is why the hell I have been posting to Twitter when I have only one follower. And I don't even know who he is or why. Then I wonder why I post here. Oh yeah, to practice writing and to get some of this stuff out of my head before it explodes. This is more fun then writing in a journal. My handwriting is pretty much unreadable in my journal (which is probably a good thing -like writing in code) and here I have to try a bit harder to form sentences, work on my spelling and grammar and maybe even focus.

Hmm, focus, what a concept.

Once again, time is an issue. Always so much going on and now that I am in a cube with another person at work, I have less time to blog. I believe that is frowned upon by management -something about Ethics. Then again they are shoving Facebook down our throats, wanting us all to build our company presence and I haven't heard of any fallout from people being on there all day. I am regularly shocked at some of the information (?) people from our company are putting out there via Facebook. So, really, what is the difference?

Please, slow this ride down

I am so overwhelmed.

Yeah, I KNOW, so is everyone else. Between visiting my brother-in-law in the hospital (an hour away) as many days as possible, my Princess dealing with her lying, cheating, son-of-a-bitch, scum bag, dumb ass husband, us preparing for her return home with our grandson (the shining light in all of this) and Duchess (second daughter) moving out, again, to make room... I just want to drink, a lot, and curl up into a ball in a dark room. Can't, have to work, take care of our Prince (son and youngest beautiful child), help support Louise (sister-out-law and BFF) and Hubby (having a very hard time dealing with his brother/BFF in so much pain), take dogs to the vet, pay bills, blah, blah, blah...Oh shit and file my taxes!! Oh somebody please slap me!

I try to find stuff to laugh at every chance I get. Unfortunately my in-laws don't always get my sick sense of humor (this is why Louise and I get along so well and why we call ourselves Thelma and Louise) and neither does my new cube mate. Today I was reading The Onion at the hospital and trying to make brother-in-law laugh but that makes him hurt so I stopped. Now, I'm going to go set the DVR to record SNL because I am so enjoying them picking on the candidates - specifically Palin, she is just way too fun to imitate.

If this is difficult to understand, follow, whatever, I apologize; I just had a very nice dinner with Hubby at an Italian restaurant and the wine is to blame.