WTF?!

Lady from corporate that used to work in this office is visiting. She is doing some presentation. Whatever. I met her a about a year and half ago but she was very cool towards me this morning when I said hi. I thought, it was just an awkward moment but then I walked past her a little later, asked her how she was doing and she ignored me. Granted she was distracted by the boss but really? So I smile at her a little later and nothing. Is it me?

So, tired of this corporate world I am currently working in. People are just cold. I want to be Me but the reaction I get from others, here, in this workspace, is just icky. Competitive, back stabbing, judgemental, FAKE and NOT nurturing in any way shape of form. And I want OUT!! But then there is New Zealand. I need to pay for my trip so I need to stay here. At least until then. In the mean time, I want to be working on another plan. Another job. A real career. Doing what I love...something creative. The difficult part(s) figuring out exactly what that is while appreciating all I have and still keeping the drive to move forward. See my dilemma?

I realize I need to suck it up, work harder and smarter and FOCUS. So I'm trying this new age thing; Sleep. I keep thinking I need meds or sleep or both and I probably do but in the mean time I'm going to start with enough sleep. This is not an easy task as I tend to fight it. Afraid I'm going to miss something I guess. And, well, there just isn't enough time in the day. Been doing this for a few days and I'm already seeing a bit of a difference in my attitude. Clearly this is like other natural therapies; it takes a while for it to get into the system and really work.

I'll check back in a week, maybe sooner, to see how I am doing.